November is here already. So fast la for me. 2011 has been a pretty good year with many surprises and first-time- experiences for me. 2011 is also the year where I had to think on my own and make my own decisions. In other words, I had to grow up. Haha. The process of growing up is not easy.

I also had the opportunity to observe other people (mostly older than me) on how they carry themselves, how they make decisions, how they lead a certain group etc. It has been eye-opening for sure.

And I learnt something from amie : Fear is a false illusion becoming real. so true. I have to remind myself that. Fear holds back someone from growing. And fear can be overcome with God's help.

on a diff note, semester break is in 4 days! Four! YAY can't wait for it. I always mention about my semester break. This shows how BADLY I want and need it haha. I make uni sound like it's a boot camp.

ok bye, till then until my next update :) thanks for reading.

how great thou art

Greed:	Medium
Gluttony:	Medium
Wrath:	Low
Sloth:	High
Envy:	Medium
Lust:	Very Low
Pride:	High

Discover Your Sins - Click Here

I know I took this test some time ago, but I decided to take it again to see if there's any difference. Well it's still the same, except that the Pride bar has gone up from medium to high. =/ Ah well. It's uni I tell you. lol. How is it that the Sloth bar still remains the highest?! urgh.

I'm now sitting in my room all alone, waiting for time to pass me by, recollecting the day's events, thinking ahead of some stuff I need to do, day-dreaming, zoning off. And I feel cold in my room coz the night's cold and the fan speed is fast. I like quiet nights like these. I get to chill and just relax and break away from the plain routines of everyday lectures. I mean, lectures can be so mundane. And brain-draining.

Oh and my semester break is coming in a week's time! yay. *jumps for joy* It's coming all right, it's coming.

xx

Many things about tomorrow,

I can't seem to understand,

But I know who holds tomorrow,

And I know who holds my hand.

tugging of the heart

"When you are a teacher, you can touch lives."

"Being a teacher is a noble job."

Huh. Quote #1 came from an aunty from church. Quote #2 came from a church friend.

In my opinion I think what they said are true. But I find myself shutting out the word 'teacher'. My heart is hard as stone towards teaching and I refused to open it up to be receptive towards all the teaching techniques learnt. Because all these while teaching never crossed my mind, and I never wanted to be one.

I don't know how I suddenly realized that the problem lies within me, how stubborn my heart and mindset can be towards my course. Wait, I think the realization hit me in church. Yeah so appropriate kan of all places. But what will happen if I become a teacher? Will I be able to touch lives? Will I be contented? Where will I be posted? Kelantan, Terengganu, rural areas?

An aunty came up to me yesterday at church and we bersembang about teaching and yada. One thing she said was that I should ask God to prepare my heart for teaching, to be receptive towards all the stuff in tesl.

But am I ready? argh I don't know. =/

love

my course mates. the people are awesome, not the course.

btw spot me! :D we were all wearing coats because we had our photo session. we all looked so prim and proper kan?

this coming tuesday, i'll be going on a rendezvous with nadia and michelle to midvalley ! i was thinking of doing some shopping. :) can't wait to berbonding with my two lovely course mates. or three, 'cause pearly might go too.

have a great weekend.

and so we had this today. outings like these make my dull days sunshiney. Thank God for people like them here in The Hole.

cold seeping in

i would love to do that right now. so relaxing, so syiok, all her woes fade away.

sometimes i get tired physically and mentally. Tired from all the assignments and tasks and lectures. Tired from walking from my college to my faculty. Tired because I lack sleep. Tired from the stereotypical and closed mindsets. Tired from all the judgement people give. Just tired la.

and amidst all the tiredness a first year student can feel, I remember this verse:

"call unto me all who are weary and i will give you rest".

And rest indeed is on its way. Next week (deepavaleh) I have some loose ends for lectures (yay!) and then comes the LONG-AWAITED 1 week sem break.

stay grounded, TM. stay grounded.

monkey invasion

so yesterday I came back to my campus after choir practice at about 10.45pm, and the first thing I saw when I opened my door was the window was opened. It was pitch black 'cause I haven't on the lights and I was stunned for 2 seconds.

I thought, Why on earth is my window open?? And when I switched on the lights, my room mate's side of the table was a lil messy, cookies and coffee powder spilled on the floor, her cookie jars were opened, MY orange kena stolen (!!), bites on my paper bag and sachets of my favourite Boh Iced Tea Peach Flavour were scattered on my desk.

Guess what happened? Obviously my room was invaded by A MONKEY!! I'm not kidding. UM is full of them. I was so shocked yesterday night and scared too (room mates weren't here) as to why my room was messy. Yeah, I was scared la. Imagine coming back at night to your room that has been messed up. Of course takut la right.

Thank God our beds weren't touched, just food only. And thank God nothing else was stolen.

anyway I want to show you my desk :) i mean, not when it was messed up by the monkeh. But after I cleaned up.

Ok it doesn't look that glamorous, but I'm used to it already. =) a bit messy kan? hehe my desk is pretty messy. Can you spot the Boh Iced Tea?

zeeebra

Do you think a lot? Every time before you sleep, does your mind play back the day's events on what happened, or what could have been, or what if's? If you do, then we can have coffee together. =) really.

share your hopes and dreams with me. I would love to hear them, so that I can be inspired too.

On a completely off note, I'll be heading back to 'The Hole' today. Yes, uni. A test on tuesday and many more events to be unfold. It'll be week 6 of uni, two more weeks 'til a much-awaited break!

A quick question: would you rather be a listener, or a talker?

I opt for the former. Why? Because listening to someone can help lift a load off that person's shoulders. Even if you don't give advice, it's completely fine.

Just listen. And give him/her a hug. Or ajak them to go makan. It'll make a difference to them.

Ok. Time to prepare to go back to The Hole. Take care all~

angelic

This week, :

1) Every night was busy for me; we had rehearsals for our Senior-Junior (SJ) Night for my college's Chinese Community (CC) until... 11-12am!

2) I sang on stage, with a mike, with three people. This time we sang More Than Words. The Banana people of CC. :P

3) I had a glimpse of how meaningful and awesome uni life is going to be. Like what someone told me; uni is the best years of one's life.

4) i was encouraged to start a journal, and to try to step out of my comfort zone to try new things. trying is way of growing up, of moulding myself to the person I want to be when I graduate ;) thanks for the great talk S.K..

5) i had so much fun through CC rehearsals and the SJ Night!! It was so ... inspiring and memorable. Albeit it took most of my sleeping hours, it was so, so worth it. Can't wait for the next one!

6) I was reminded, twice in a day on different occasions by different people of God's purpose for placing me in UM. now that ain't a coincidence, yo.

7) it was the most memorable and awesome week among the five weeks in UM. Tq God! <3<3

chains be broken

I love this show. Every saturday I have to watch this. It's a must. It's the only show I watch on tv because i don't have a tv in my room in uni. So this show is like a breath of fresh air after a long and tiring routine in uni. That's why I always look forward to weekends!

My weekends are so precious. I wouldn't trade it for anything at all.

Grey's A. spices up saturday nights. If you haven't watch it, YOU MUST. you will love it. Confirm la.

How does one survive in uni? hmm. Survive? I made it sound like uni is so hard to live in. Well actually it isn't to be honest. It's just my mindset and how I perceive it. Uni will always be there, it'll never change, the courses are always the same. It's how I take it in, whether in a positive or negative light.

on a different note... i want to go home!! homehomehome. nothing beats home.

going gets tougher

is uni all about assignments? nothing else? the assignments are eating up my weekends 'til i have no time for myself to just sit at home, laze on the couch and not worry haha. I confess I am a worrier. =/

I can do ALL THINGS (assignments too) through christ who strengthens me.

7 things

I have:

1) a pair of medium shade of grey coloured converse shoes which costs RM***
2) 5 pairs of dorothy perkins jeans (i'm so proud I bought them from there because them jeans are awesome)

3) a new lappie! red in colour some more

4) 3 to four assignments to do. :-(

5) two weddings to attend. one for Oct the other for Nov.

6) so many dreams! :)

7) to reconsider my mindset, whether to go through this 4 years of tesl with a heavy heart and doing it for the sake of doing it or be thankful and ask God why am I in tesl.

My favourite all time cartoon show, Bananas in Pajamas. I love love love this show. I remembered vividly I used to sit directly in front of the tv watching this. And I thought the lighter coloured female bear will couple up with the male bear. lol what a thought.

ta. have a great weekend! I know I will. :) God bless you all. For those overseas, teresa, diana, nigel, lucinda, keep safe. really hope to see you all soon. xoxo

of rain and segregation

In which I have met some queer chinese who segregate non-chinese speakers a.k.a bananas like me. Thank you for never failing to alienate us bananas.

Definition of alienate from dictionary.com: to make indifferent or hostile. There you go.

But but, i've met some truly nice mandarin speakers who took the time to explain to me when someone speaks in mandarin, or who doesn't give a hoot about alienating bananas. And for that I am grateful for their kind understanding and friendship. :)

It's all about adaptation to a new environment with less english speakers and more mandarin speakers. I long for PJ people to speak English to me! <-only on weekends la when I balik rumah. Actually, I balik rumah every single week lo. Even Nadia, my closest course mate also tegur me about going home every week. But I can't help it. I am a homey person. =)

tata!